Ups and Downs

Firstly thanks for still reading despite my absence of late.  Just to give you a little insight into my life recently I have been working on a big new project at work and things got rather busy there for a while.  I was working 10-12 hour days seven days a week, running meetings, writing documents, blaa blaa blaa.  Then on the 22nd August I was in a hotel lobby after having been for dinner with clients in Leeds and I began to feel feint, I woke up on the floor surrounded by strangers and an hour later I was in hospital via an Ambulance, it was totally embarrassing!

Apparently I was suffering from very high blood pressure and very low blood sugar caused by, among other things, working too hard, stress and not eating properly. I got quite the lecture from the doctor about not looking after myself and then Mistress arrived the next morning and I got the lecture all over again except this time it came with threats!

Mistress drove me home and as soon as we got in she made me strip and then lie on the bed, then she tied me to it, not tight and spread eagled or anything but securely with chains padlocked to leather cuffs, then she covered my up with the duvet and left me to my “enforced r&r” (her words) for a full twenty four hours, the only time she disturbed me was to feed which she did four times during my “captivity” whether I wanted to eat or not. One time she did untie me long enough to use the bathroom.

To be honest I am grateful, I slept almost the whole time and when she finally freed me I felt more relaxed and energetic than I had in weeks, I showed her my gratitude immediately which she accepted very graciously, between her legs!

I didn’t go back to work until the following Monday, which was a bank holiday but we had a big meeting in the City (Business District of London) which was basically the culmination of all my work, the big decision, and everything went perfectly and the deal went through and a few days later I got a RIDICULOUS bonus (sorry for gloating!) and a week off. Mistress and I went on holiday and it was just great to get away with her.

So anyway, blog, I’m trying to get back into writing now that I have a little more time and I am starting where I left off which seems appropriate. I owed everyone a report on the Dice Game that I asked for and so rudely didn’t deliver on so here it is…

The first person to post their dice numbers in the right place was markh101 (sorry Simon!) who rolled the following numbers; 3, 3, 2, 6, 5.  That equates to wearing a boob tube and wet look leggings, along with 8″ heels, to a friends house with a large anal plug inserted and staying for fifty minutes.

Shockingly I don’t (didn’t)  own a boob tube or “wet look” leggings so I had to go out and acquire some, I found some at Primark which were both cheap and not too terrible. Perhaps less surprisingly I did have a large butt plug in my toy chest so I had almost everything I needed, except for shoes.

I have plenty of shoes, more than plenty really, but none that are quite eight inches high so I  had to settle for some six inch ones but I don’t think that should constitute a fail, they are still fairly high shoes!

The plug that I chose is 2.5″ wide and is not easy for me to get in, I have a reasonably tight ass despite the use it has been put to over the years! After having a shower I used some lube on the plug and then placed it on the floor and squatted over it, I reached behind me and pulled my ass cheeks apart and positioned myself so that the cold tip touched my hole. Then I pushed down, hard!

I bit down on my lip to help me take the pain from my asshole being stretched wide. It felt like something much larger, a watermelon maybe, trying to make its way into my ass but I kept on the pressure, pushing down as hard as I could despite the burning stretching sensation that such an act brings with it. Eventually, after some minutes of pure pain, my ass gave in and I slid down onto the plug.

There was relief as my hole retracted around the plug mixed with the unusual and uncomfortable feeling as the wide plug pushed into me stretching my insides before settling deep inside me.  As I laid on floor, on my side, recovering my composure and readying myself to get back up I ran a finger up my pussy, predictably I was soaking wet.

After I had dragged myself pack to my feet and cleaned myself up a little (down there!) I got into my outfit.  I was a little worried that the plug would show through the tight leggings but once I had them on I checked myself out in the mirror and it was fine, the part of the plug that sticks out isn’t too big on that plug so you couldn’t tell at all, although I could really feel it digging into my ass cheeks.

I pulled on the boob tube top, no bra, and then slid my feet into the shoes, I looked ridiculous! There had been no rules on makeup or hair so I did my makeup pretty standard but a bit heavy on the eye shadow and then put my hair in a tight pony tail which just seemed appropriate.

I had organised to go and see a gay (male) friend of mine who I haven’t seen in a while so I left the house and ran to the car hoping no-one would see me, unfortunately I dropped my keys as I ran and had to stop and bend over and fumble about in the flower bed to find them again.  Also, just to be clear, when I say I ran, I’m not talking Usain Bolt here, it was more tottering along at a slightly faster than walking pace, but even so it wasn’t easy wearing such a large plug up my ass!

The next challenge was sitting in the car, for some reason I didn’t really think about it despite the fact that the plug was right up there on my brains list of current affairs, I just plonked myself down as I normally do when I get in the car and immediately felt like I’d had the wind knocked out of me as the plug was forced deeper into me with a lot of force, I actually yelped, partly from the pain and partly from the total surprise.  I sat in the car for a least five minutes just getting my breath back and then turned the car on and set off.

The drive was short and as I got there I called him to tell him I was there, I wasn’t keen on the idea of hanging around on the street (he has no front garden) in those ridiculous clothes looking like a 90’s prostitute! When he opened the door he just burst out laughing!

I managed to push my way inside and when he finished rolling around on the floor laughing at me I told him my pre-prepared story, I was going to a 90’s disco party and wanted to try out my outfit on him (good eh?!).  He said he loved it, it was perfect! Phew!

He offered me a glass of wine and it would have been rude to say no! I took the wine but immediately spilt it as I sat down once again forgetting to do it gently! I managed to contain the yelp this time so he didn’t notice (I don’t think) that I was reacting to anything and just thought I was clumsy.

After that was all sorted though his first words were “I think maybe a bra with that top hunni” and then he smiled a wide smile, I looked down and my nipples were sticking out like bullets through the thin top, it had been a bit cold outside and to be honest the constant self inflicted anal abuse was starting to get me going a little.  I put my arm over my tits and blushed but he just started laughing again!

I stayed much longer than the prescribed fifty minutes, in fact it was nearer two hours later that I left, my ass was really aching by that point and I had been shuffling around a lot in my seat, my friend kept telling me to sit still, fortunately he isn’t my Dom because I would have found it very difficult to comply.

I repeated my little run, managing not to drop my keys this time, and got back into the house unseen (probably). I stripped the clothes off and got on my beds, hands and knees like a doggy bitch, my right hand went straight to my pussy whilst my left gripped the plug and began pulling on it, retracting it a little, then pushing it back in and retracting it a little more.

My fingers worked frantically at my clit as the plug started to come out and then I just gripped it tight and pulled as hard as I could and came loudly as my ass relinquished the plug and I collapsed on the bed.

My ass was really REALY sore and when I looked at the plug it had blood smeared all over it, clearly my ass had taken a pounding with this thing. Like a good slut I cleaned the plug with my tongue and then I went and took another shower, I used the shower head on my ass which stung like crazy and ran red a little bit. After my shower I wrapped myself in my fluffy dressing gown and curled up on my bed.

My ass was sore for a couple of days, quite bad the first day but not too much after that and there was no more blood so the damaged can’t have been all that bad.

So that was my first dice game challenge, I know the report was not quite as prompt as it should have been, in fact it was ridiculously late if truth be told but as I’ve said real life has very much got in the way in the last few weeks and although things are still pretty hectic my schedule is a little easier to manage now so I’m hoping to increase the blog posts over the coming days and weeks, the next of which will be along shortly and will centre around a certain party that I attended.

My toy chest

I’ve had my toy chest for several years, it’s a black leather trunk like the one pictured above. It is a 2×1 foot rectangle and about a foot high, has a locking latch on the front and lives at the bottom of my walk in wardrobe, which sounds fancy but is basically just a small closet where I keep my clothes…and toys!

As those who follow this blog regularly will know, I have being dancing around showing Kayleigh the contents of my toy chest for some time mainly because I was worried about what her reaction would be.

You can read a list of the contents of my chest here, they are basically things I have collected over the years for use in bedroom play some of which are fairly tame like vibrators and handcuffs and some of which are fairly extreme like BBQ skewers and a speculum made for horses!

NOTE: The horse speculum was an epic failure as I could only just get it in me and even then when I tried to open it the thing just kept sliding out!

I did think about taking some of the more extreme things out before showing it to Kayleigh but then I thought that it wouldn’t be a good representation of me and I really wanted her to see the full, uncensored version of me in all my depraved glory!  I think what really scared me was possibility that she would see that and run a mile and I really don’t handle rejection very well, I protect myself against it as much as possible!

However, things have been going very well with Kayleigh of late and I feel we are growing closer all the time, she does seem to get me and I think I get her and we both seem to give each other what we need in the BDSM word AND in normal everyday life. So I decided to just go for it.

Unfortunately life conspired against me and the weekend I was intending to reveal all to her my mother got ill and had to go into hospital, so I headed back to Cornwall to see her and that opportunity was gone.

By the way, thank you for the well wishes, she is out of hospital and doing fine now.

Then the weekend before last I was going to show her on Saturday night after a nice meal that I was going to cook, but she had to work, she has an evening job in a bar as her secretary job doesn’t bring in enough money. Finally a week last Sunday we got to have the evening together and I showed her my toys.

I think I made a bigger deal of it than I needed to, I think she thought I was going to reveal to her that I used to be a man or something!

We had a nice meal which I had cooked and I told her that I had something to show her and that I had been keeping it from her because I was worried how she would react and that I didn’t want to scare her off. Sometimes when I’m nervous I can just talk for England even though in my head I’m saying “Stop talking now, stop, no really stop”!

So I lead her into the bedroom where I had put the open chest on my bed and I went and sat beside it on the bed.  I told her that it was my toy chest and that it contained all of the toys I have collected over the years, I told her that I had used all of them or had them used on me at one time or another.

She didn’t say anything at first, she just started picking things up out of the chest and looking at them, I couldn’t stand silence so I started talking again, I said that I knew some of them are a bit weird and quite extreme and that is why I wanted to show her so she could see the how far my kinks go because I didn’t want to keep any of that from her…..she put a finger on my lips, then she smiled and pulled out a ball gag.

I opened my mouth as she pushed the ball in and fastened the strap tight enough to hurt, then she grinned a little more and pulled out a padlock and slipped it through the ring on the buckle to lock the gag.

Next she pulled out a pair of clover clamps which went straight on to my nipples. She roughly pulled my top down, grabbed each nipple and attached the clamps then gave them a tug causing an exquisite pinch in both my nips simultaneously.

The next item to come out was the collar and lead, she had a very wicked grin on her face as she buckled the leather collar loosely around  my neck and let the lead (leash) hang between my breasts.

A pair of handcuffs went on my wrists behind my back and then she attached another pair just above my elbows, this pulled my arms right back and into a very uncomfortable position but I just sat there and let her have her fun.

She continued going through the chest pulling out dildos and clamps and plugs, then she got to the box of nails. They are long thin nails and I keep them in a plastic box filled with surgical spirit, I watched her as she opened it and took out a nail, she touched the sharp point with her finger and then sort of shrugged and put it back in the box and sealed it again.  This was one of the items I was worried about because it’s fairly extreme to have nails put into you but she didn’t seem bothered at all by it!

The chest has a little tray at the bottom with compartments in it which I use to keep different kinds of toys separate and easy to find.  She had come to the plugs compartment and went through them one at a time, the first three are just rubber anal plugs of different sizes, the fourth is a solid steel one with a D ring on the end of it (the end that stays outside!).  The fifth is a very recent purchase, it looks like a normal metal plug but when you push a ring in at the end the plug opens up like the petals on a flower which makes it much large inside you and completely impossible to remove. The finishing touch is that when it is open you can use a padlock to keep it open and therefore prevent it being removed.

Kayleigh messed about with it for a little while whilst I watched, there is a little rubber ring that goes around the plug to keep the “petals” closed when it isn’t being used and once she figured out that came off she soon figured out the true cruel purpose of the toy, and wanted to try it out.

She told me to get off the bed and when I hopped off she turned me round and bent me over it. She lifted my skirt over my ass and then ran the cold metal plug along my slit, then she pushed it inside my pussy and pulled it back out. When she pulled my ass cheeks apart and put the plug to my hole I could feel my juices on it, no need for lube when your sub is always wet!

My ass it quite tight but she applied plenty of force and the plug went it fairly easily, my ass stretching to take it all in, then she opened the petals.  It’s a very odd feeling when it opens up inside you, its painful but it’s also just very weird, I don’t know how to describe it. Anyway I yelped when she opened it and it stretched my insides, then she very quickly locked it with another padlock.

She left me bent over the bed while she went through the rest of my toys and then all of sudden flipped me over onto back. My arms were agony when I put all my weight on them and handcuffs dug in painfully, I forgot all that though when she held up the horse speculum and raised her eyebrows in a “what the fuck?” expression! I just looked at her, went red, and tried to smile (not easy with a ball gag in your mouth!).

I watched as she opened it up and then put her arm through the middle of it and then laid it on my stomach so the bottom was level with the opening of my pussy, it came up almost to my tits! She just laugh and shook her head and threw it back in the chest.

I watched her throw all of the toys that she had taken out (and not used) back into the chest with horror. I’m not a particularly tidy person but I always keep my toy chest pristine!  The only thing she kept out was a paddle.

She took hold of my leash and helped me get up off the bed and the led me to the lounge where she sat on the sofa and gestured for me to kneel in front of her which I did.

She spoke in a soft kind voice and told me that she was very happy that I wanted to show her my toys and that I shouldn’t have been worried because nothing in there shocked her or worried her, not even the “ridiculous speculum”. She said that I shouldn’t have kept it a secret though and that she felt that the paddle (she held it up) would help me to remember not to keep things from her in future.

She pulled my leash and motioned for my to get up onto the sofa so I climbed up and she got me laid across her lap with my ass over her knees. As soon as I was in position she started to hit my ass with the paddle.

It wasn’t too bad at first, she wasn’t hitting me that hard and she was alternating between ass cheeks as she went. She kept it up at a constant speed, SMACK on the left cheek then SMACK on the right and then SMACK on the left.  After a few minutes it started to get uncomfortable and then after about ten minutes it was really starting to burn. She had increased the speed or the force but it my ass was really starting to get tender and sore!

After about fifteen minutes it was really starting to hurt lot, my ass felt like it was burning and every hit with the paddle sent a shocking sting through my ass. I tried to move my ass away to give me a seconds rest from it but she had her spare hand on my lower back and held me down firmly with it.

After twenty minutes I had tears running down my cheeks and I was trying to beg her to stop through the gag but she ignored me and continued with the relentless SMACKing of the paddle. I can’t remember anyone ever giving me such consistent punishment for such a long time before ever, it was absolute torture, much worse than ten really hard whacks with a cane, that is like a really fast big pain and then it subsides to a manageable level, this started off completely bearable but became excruciating and by the time she finished after thirty minutes I was an absolute mess, I was sobbing and trying to get away.

She hadn’t talked to me the whole time but now that she had finished she told me to kneel back in front of her. I VERY gingerly got back onto the floor on my knees and knelt up in front of her, she just smiled sweetly and said “kneel down hunni” so I lowered my ass onto my heels and closed my eyes as I put my weight on my tender rear, it hurt so bad!

She looked into my eyes and I looked into hers (god I love her eyes!) and she said “OK, have you learnt your lesson?” and I nodded emphatically to which she said “So no more secrets?” and I nodded again, then she smiled and said “Good girl”. She says that to e all the time, it’s so patronising, I love it!

She came around behind me and I felt immense relief in my arms as she released first the elbow cuffs and then the wrist cuffs before sitting back down in front of me. I shook some life back into my arms as she watched me then she said “open you legs” which I did whilst blushing because I knew it was rather wet down there! She grinned and said “now cum for me”.

I leaned back and supported myself on my left arm while my right hand went down between my legs and began a circular motion around my clit. It’s so easily for me to make myself cum since I got my piercing and I was moaning within thirty seconds and cumming within a minute!

She had to go home shortly after that, she left me in the gag, collar, plug and clamps but said I could remove them once she’d gone. The only problem was that she’d pulled all of the keys out of the padlocks in my chest and left them all in a big pile in the bottom, including the ones for the gag and plug!

After I’d finally got myself free of everything and tidied up my chest (over an hour later) I went for a shower. My ass was red raw and really bruised, it felt even worse than right after the paddling and I couldn’t sit down at all. I went to sleep lying naked on my front with no covers on me.

The next day I didn’t have any choice but to sit down as I was in work and it was pure hell. I couldn’t sit still all day because it was so sore and it was the end of the week before it started to feel better really.

This was all a couple of weeks ago now and its all healed up fine now, I still can’t believe how much of an affect it had just doing a constant rhythm of hits, I think we’re going to have to experiment with this a bit more!!

Life is very busy at the moment with work, that’s why the posts have been lacking a bit, I’ve been writing this one post for ages just trying to get enough time to finish it! Oh well, you’ll just have to bear with me whilst work is like it is I’m afraid.

The dreaded dog cage has arrived, I can’t remember if I’ve said that already, we had a little test of it last weekend and it is really quite small, not that I am particularly big there still isn’t much room to move around in it, I just know I’m going to be spending some serious time in it soon though!

Kayleigh says that the locking piercing ring has arrived too, I haven’t seen it yet but I’m hoping she is going to put it in soon, it makes me really horny thinking about having it locked in me!  The idea will be that the dog tag clip is soldered as well so that will be hanging from my clit “permanently” when she fastened on the piercing ring as well! Very exciting!

Last thing, I promised no more secrets after the paddling and since then it’s been eating away at me that she doesn’t know about this blog. The problem is that once I tell her about it I won’t be able to talk about her anymore or ask people’s opinions about things because she will be able to read it all whenever she wants. This blog my only real outlet for me to talk about my BDSM lifestyle except for a couple of friends from on here (you know who you are hun x) and I’m not sure I want to give that up. But if I don’t then I am effectively lying to my Domme and that makes me a very bad sub. I’m very conflicted about this!

Sleep over

Kayleigh arrived late at about twenty past seven by which time I had easily been wearing my plug for over four hours so I didn’t have to worry about that.  I’d put on a bit of an outfit for her, thigh high stocking and some nice stiletto heals, a little grey micro mini skirt and one of my suit jackets that matched the skirt. There was nothing on underneath the jacket and it was just done up with one button. It was basically a slutty version of what I wear to work!

Anyway, I opened the door as she walked up the path an straight into the house, as she went passed she pulled the back of my skirt a little to check I was wearing the plug and then carried on into the front room.  I closed the door and followed her in, she went and sat on the sofa and I stopped in the doorway to give her chance to see my outfit, she looked at me and span her finger around in the air so I gave her a twirl, she just grinned and said “You’re such a slut! Come here”. I walked over to her and she pointed at the floor so I kneeled next to her knees.

She had been at work late and hadn’t eaten so she had got some chips on her way over, I took them into the kitchen and put them on a plate then returned and placed them gently on her knee and handed her a glass of wine (none for me) and then knelt beside her again.

We watched some TV while she ate her chips, occasionally she would move a chip to the edge of the plate nearest me indicating I could take it, I had already eaten but I love chips so I ate them happily, I only got about four though. She also let me sip her wine a couple of times.

Once she finished her food she moved the plate, laid my head on her lap and stroked my hair while she spoke to me. She asked me if I still felt the way I had described the other day at the coffee shop and I told that I did. She said that she was very pleased to hear that and that she has been thinking about us a lot since then.

I listen intently as she says that she has decided she would like to make the vanilla side of our relationship public knowledge, that she would like to meet my friends as my girlfriend and have more involvement in my day to day life rather than just our BDSM relationship.

I try to interrupt her to tell her that I am not really “out” as a none heterosexual but she puts a finger on my lips so I shut up.  She goes on to tell me that she knows I am “in the closet” but she feels that it isn’t good for me to live like that and that she wants to help me “come out” in a nice gentle way that won’t scare my friends or family away.  My heart skips a beat when she mentions my family! How can I tell my mother that I’m dating a girl!?

She hasn’t finished yet though, she goes on to tell me that she is happy to keep the full nature of our relationship private but that she reserves the right to reveal it to people who she feels will not have any baring on my “normal” life. She goes on to tell me that in private I should behave appropriately for a sub and that tonight has been a good example of how I should act.  She tells me that in return she will look after my needs but only after her own and that she expects complete obedience from me.

At this point my pussy is wet and my stomach is doing somersaults! All the stuff about being like a proper sub and her looking after my needs and things makes me really happy. The stuff about telling my friends and family that I have a girlfriend scares the crap out of me! I decide to keep that to myself for the time being as this doesn’t really feel like the time to discuss it! Its more of a her talking and me listening scenario!

She asks me if I understand and I just look up at her and nod. She says “Good, go and get a cane”.

Off I go to my room to get the cane from my toy chest. On my way back I hear her in the bathroom so I go into the lounge, kneel on the floor with my knees spread and hold the cane up on my open palms. What a good little sub I am!

When she comes back she has got changed, she is wearing a proper Dome outfit! If you could picture a stereotypical Dominatrix outfit, that’s what she looks like! I love it. Black PVC mini dress, matching knee high boots and I can just see a black leather thong underneath. She’s finished it off perfectly with black gloves that go up her arms and some wickedly high heals.

She does a little twirl mimicking my own from early and my face breaks out into a big grin of approval. She saunters over to me and takes the cane from my hands, I go to move my hands behind my back but she tells me to leave them where they are so I do. She walks around me and I can feel her eyes all over my body, I’m already so wet!

When she moved back in front of me she tells me to keep very still and then I watch her taking aim on the palms of my hands. I know its going to hurt but she brings the cane down with such force that I can’t help but screw them into fists as the searing pain runs through them and tears well in my eyes. I like pain but there are certain areas of my body where I like it more than others, my feet and hands are probably where I like it least.

She tells me to put my hands back out and slowly I do but they are shaking in pain and anticipation of another blow but instead she leans down and kisses each of my palms, her lips feel cool on my stinging hands, it feels nice.

She disappears behind me for  moment and then returns with some clamps, crouching in front of me I look into her beautiful eyes as she unbuttons my jacket and then pinches each nipple in turn attaching a clamp, they are hard clamps and they bite down brutally on my sensitive nipples but I try not to show it in my face.

She gets back up and tells me to “lean forward, head on the floor, hands behind your back” and I obey as quickly and elegantly as I can. My hands are still stinger as I cross my wrists at the small of my back, I believe this is called the Slavers Kiss position in the Gorean world.

She runs the cane over my ass, pulling my short skirt out of the way and tapping my cheeks softly a few times, running it up the middle, teasing me. I know what is coming isn’t going to be soft, the hit to the hands was a message reinforcing what the said the other day, she wants to leave some marks!

She tells me “Don’t make a sound” just before she the first blow strikes the middle of both my ass cheeks, I yelp and reach for my stinging ass! Its been a long time since I’ve had a really hard caning on my ass, Kayleigh’s are usually half as hard as this!  I’m only holding my ass a few seconds though because she hits the back of my hands with the cane, its not as hard as before but enough to make me move them!

“DON’T MOVE AND DON’T MAKE A SOUND!” she says, emphasizing her words by kicked my knees out a little wider, I get back my position and brace for the next one.  It comes only seconds later but it misses my ass and hits the top of my thighs instead which is completely unexpected and though I keep my position, only lifting my ass a little higher I can’t help letting out a little squeak before I can catch myself.

I hear her sigh and then I hear something drop to the floor right next to my head, I don’t dare move to look what it was but she kicks my foot and says “Put it on” so I look and find a red ball gag next to my head. I blush brightly, I actually feel ashamed that I couldn’t keep quiet and have to have a gag. I pick it up and push it into my mouth, struggling to buckle it up due to my position and my sore hands. She waits patiently until I am done and return to my position.

I can feel her very carefully positioning the cane before each of the next three blows, each one lands on a new spot and in my mind I can picture the five red lines running down my ass. I manage to keep more or less still for them and the gag helps to keep my quiet but by the end my ass is on fire. Normally after an ass caning my ass will just be sore all over. This time, either because of the spacing of the hits or the severity of them I can feel each individual stripe, stringing like crazy!

She takes a handful of my hair and pulls me back up onto my knees, I move my hands long enough to help myself up and then fold them behind me. She squats down again and looks at me saying “Are you OK?”, I nod and then am shocked when she slaps my face hard, tears well up as she looks directly into my eyes with her big beautiful blue ones and says “If I say to not make a sound, BE QUIET! OK?”. My nodding lets the tears run down my cheeks.

I don’t really know where the tears came from, shock more than anything I think, I really wasn’t expecting the slap! Also when she stared at me like that I felt really ashamed of myself for not being quiet when she said so. This is all a big change from what it has been like so far, yeah she has given me orders and “Domme’d” me but this just feels a lot more serious! That’s not to say I wasn’t enjoying it!

She wipes away my tears and smiles, then gives me a deep passionate kiss which I reciprocate enthusiastically until she pulls away and stands back up. She walks back behind me and then sits on the sofa and says “Don’t get up but come here”. As I turn I see her leather thong on the floor, she is sat on the sofa, legs spread, one foot up on the coffee table. As I move towards her on my knees I know what she wants, I gesture to remove the gag and she nods so I unbuckle it and drop it onto the floor before I reach her.

I don’t waste any time, as soon as I reach her my head goes under her short skirt, I can immediately feel the heat on my face as I reach my tongue out and run it up her wet slit, she tastes wonderful and I immediately begin sucking on her clit and playing my tongue over it.

I feel her take my hand and put a buzzing vibe into it then she grabs my hair and turns my head so I can hear her, “Make us cum together” she says and then leans back on the sofa. My tongue goes back to work on her as my other hand reaches between my legs pushing the vibe against my clit rather than inserting it.

I’m ready almost immediately but I keep my orgasm at bay until Kayleigh is moaning loudly, she reaches down grabbing my hair and pushed my face harder into her crotch and I press the vibe hard against my own, we both cum, her loudly, me into her pussy.

We lay there a little while, her laid back on the sofa and me with me cheek against her hot pussy while she strokes my hair, the vibe is still buzzing away on the floor somewhere. After a while she tells me to go and clean myself up then to come back, naked and with my hair up, as I walk out she says “Leave the stockings on”.

When I reach the bathroom I can see Kayleigh’s juices glistening on my face and once I’ve removed my clothes I check and thighs are coated in my own. I use a cloth damp with warm water to clean my face and then my thighs and pussy. Then I reapply my makeup and lastly put my hair into a high pony tail before I head back to the front room wearing only my stockings.

The front room is empty but I find her in my bedroom, she is lying on the bed wearing the gift I had left there to give her later. I scowl at her because she wasn’t supposed to find it yet but she looks gorgeous in it so I can’t help but grin. She mouths “Thank you” and then pats the bed next to her bringing a huge grin to my face. Before I get to the bed through she says, get  two pairs of handcuffs, some rope and your black henna.

I can feel her watching me as I retrieve the items from the chest in my wardrobe, I’m willing her not to ask for a look as I’m not ready to reveal the complete extent of my kinks to her yet (I know Manc, I don’t know why when she already knows the worst stuff!) but she doesn’t ask, she just waits for me to return to the bed with the items. I lay them next to her and she motions for me to get on my front which I do, wincing a little as the clamps dig into my breasts.

She is very gentle as she locks my wrists into the handcuffs and then locks my ankles into the second pair. Then she takes a piece of the rope and ties it to the wrist cuffs before wrapping it around the bars of the headboard, pulling it tight and tying it off. She does the same with the ankle cuffs pulling until I move enough to be stretched out quite effectively and unable to move.

I can hear her getting the henna kit ready so I just lie still for fifteen minutes enjoying the feeling of being completely at her mercy. Eventually she climbs over my body, straddling me and sitting on my still sore ass, I can feel the heat of her pussy on my lower back.

She moves my pony tail out of the way and tells me to stay still, then she gets to work with the henna. She starts free hand on the back on my neck, at first I’m a little worried because it is a bit too much of a visible spot but I figure I can hide it by keeping my hair down so I’m not too worried.  Obviously I have no idea what she is putting on me but the very fact she is using the henna makes me so horny! I love having my body marked like this by someone else.

She spends a while on the neck part, it feels like she is doing writing and then she starts spreading it out going down my back, using some of the templates to make patterns but gong free hand a lot of the time.  She carries on down my back, right to the top of my ass which I assumes she avoids because there must be pretty bad welts there by now.

By the time she has finished I’m feeling completely relaxed, completely submissive and just wonderful really. She lays back down next to me and I stare into her eyes, she looks very pleased with herself and I smile back at her. We kiss very passionately and I just want to make love to her but I can’t move to do anything about it.

She gets up and I hear her in the bathroom for a little while, then she comes back and she has some lotion that she rubs into my ass. I can feel hand fingers running up and down over the striped welts and I can hear a smile in her voice when she says “you’re going to have these a while hun”, I smile too.

After we have been just lying there for quite a while, her stroking my hair and talking to me, me mainly listening and nodding, she releases the cuffs on my ankles and rolls one of my stockings down my leg. With it free she wraps it around my head, blindfolding me very effectively, then she unlocks the wrists cuffs and helps me to my feet.

I’m a bit disoriented as she leads me to the bathroom and then sits me on the side of the bath. She uses warm water from the shower and a soft sponge to wash the henna crust off my back and then dries me gently. I’m led carefully back to the bedroom and this time I’m laid on my back, still blindfolded, before the cuffs are reattached.

After a few minutes Kayleigh comes back and I feel a dildo press against my lips, I automatically open them and quickly realise it isn’t a dildo at all when the flat piece of rubbed presses against my lips. She lifts my head and I keep it there while she fastens the strap behind my head. I can tell which gag it is she has put on me, she has this amazing dildo gag with is basically a ball gag with a panel to cover the mouth and then a dildo sticking out of the front, it is a massively humiliating gag to wear!

Obviously I can’t see but I feel her climb onto the bed and sense her body lowering over my head. She wastes no time sliding onto the dildo and I feel it pushing against my mouth as she begins to fuck my “face cock”.

I try and thrust towards her as best I can as she bounces up and down, I can smell her pussy and feel drops of her juice splash my face but most of all I can hear her, she is definitely enjoying it! After about five, maybe ten minutes of her using my face I can tell she is about to cum and as she does she reaches behind and rips the clamps off my nipples without opening them.

The clamps have been on there for a good few hours by this point and I really wasn’t expecting them to come off just then. Anyone who has worn clamps  for a while will know why I screamed like crazy into the gag, which I guess was her plan because it must have sent mad vibrations through that gag and into her pussy!!

After about five minutes we had both calmed down a little and she climbed off me and disappeared. I just lay there, horny as hell hoping she would come back and give me a little of what she had just got.  A few minutes later she returned and unbuckled the gag, my jaw was aching as she pulling it out of my mouth but she just turned it round and pushed it back between my lips. I hungrily cleaned her juices off it before she put it to one side.

She climbed onto the bed again and began gentle rubbing my sore nipples, then taking them into her mouth and sucking on them gently, it felt wonderful and made me even hornier, eventually her hand slipped between my legs and she brought me to a gently but deeply satisfying orgasm.

After I had cleaned her fingers she whispered “bed time” in my ear. I lifted my body as best I could so she could pull the covers out from under me and then she laid them on top of me before climbing in beside me.

Fortunately I don’t move much in my sleep so the restraints didn’t bother me so much and I was able to sleep quite well. I heard her alarm go off in the morning and after a couple of snoozes she got out of bed and I heard the shower. Then she came back in and I heard the hair drier and then her doing her makeup.  I still couldn’t see because of the blindfold and when it went quiet for a while I thought she had left me like this.

Eventually I sensed her near me, she pulled the blindfold off and I squinted at the brightness in the room. She was dressed smartly for work, no trace of the Domme from last night remaining except in her eyes. She bent down and kissed me hard before she pulled the rope free that was holding my wrists above me, then she walked out of the room and thirty seconds later she left the house.

I managed to sit myself up and found the handcuff key on the bed side table, I freed my wrists and then my ankles. I was achy when I got up from not moving for so long. I was in the bathroom ten minutes before I remembered the henna.

With my back to the large mirror on the wall I used a hand mirror to see my back. First I checked my neck where it said “KAYLEIGH’S SLUT” in small careful lettering. Below it were curved lines that looked like vines running down my spine all the way to the crack of my ass, further vines spread out over my shoulder blades ending in some intricate flowers which she had used the templates for. The whole thing actually looks quite beautiful, I didn’t know she was such an artist.

I was working from home Friday so I had shower and got some breakfast, then sent a text to Kayleigh thanking her for last night and for the henna before I sat down to get on with my paper work.

So that’s the report of Thursday (19th April) night, hope you enjoy it, I certainly did! Its 13.10 now and I expect to get my instructions from Kayleigh soon as to where to go and what to wear. I have to say I’m quite nervous, as far as I am aware I’ve not laid eyes on these people before and god knows what they are going to want me to do, well I know of at least one thing I suppose!

Oh, I forgot to mention, I closed the poll on the birthday present. The top choices were:

  1. Nipple Rings with Connecting Chain
  2. Horizontal Clit Ring with tag saying “Kayleigh’s Slut”
  3. Inner Labia Rings

I will give Kayleigh these as my three options when I see her on Sunday. I have to be honest I think she will choose the tag with her name on it, that’s what I would choose I think, but she may surprise me, we will see!

Dante’s Task

Introduce a Pain task for the week section like going grocery shopping in a short skirt with no panties and 8 needles criss- crossing your cunt lips dripping blood down your thighs as you push the shopping cart through the veggie section of the market amid the gauking village folk

So that is the comment I got from Dante the other day, along with some other sarcastic remarks!  I decided to take up his challenge and actually completed it some time ago but have been too busy, tired or lazy to write about it!

I picked out an outfit first, a short red tartan skirt that came to about mid-thigh and is from an old fancy dress outfit. I matched it with a black vest top with a pattern on the front and then later I added a waist length jacket over the top. On my feet I wore some black four inch heels.

I have a chest at home where I store all of my “toys” and in the chest is a box dedicated to things that need to be kept sterile, for instance there is a catheter in there that I purchased but never used.  It is also the place where I keep my needles and I retrieved eight medium gauged ones and then locked the chest back up.

I laid on my bed naked, propped up by pillows, and spread my legs wide, then I removed all of the needles from their packaging and laid them next to me. This isn’t the first time I’ve pierced my own labia but the anticipation of it still gets my heart going a little faster.  I took my right lip between my thumb and finger and held it away from my body, then I picked up a needle with my other hand and pulled off the plastic cover with my teeth.

I love the feeling of piercing my flesh, getting my nipples pierced when I was eighteen was actually the start of my life as a masochist and I still relish the sensation to this day.  Even through a relatively thin amount of flesh you can still feel the initial prick as the sharp point breaks the skin and then the dull scratchy sensation as the needle pierces through your flesh and then finally and sharp pain as the metal pushes your skin out from the inside and then the sudden relief as it breaks through and your flesh contracts along the needle.

Sometimes I just jab a small needle like this in and because it is so sharp it just goes straight through but with this first one I took my time and enjoyed all the sensations.  I pushed the needle right in until the plastic cap was against my lip and the sharp end was tucked under the lip on the other side.

I put two needles through each lip slowly, one at the top and one at the bottom on each side, then I added two more on each side by jabbing them straight through, it’s not as enjoyable a technique but its fun in different ways.  I made sure all the needles were pushed all the way in so their points could tuck under the opposite labia and scratch as I walked.

I got off the bed and carefully got dressed in my outfit, looking in the mirror I looked fairly normal, a bit slutty but normal other than that.  I paced up and down the room a little to make sure walking wasn’t going to be too much of a problem and it was fine if somewhat uncomfortable.

The car journey was about thirty minutes because I didn’t want to go to a local supermarket dressed like that.  By the time I walked through the front doors and picked up a basket, the points of the needles had embedded themselves in opposite pussy lip to the one they we’re pierced through and I could feel them twisting back and forth as I walked.

As I lingered in the fruit and veg section (as requested, sort of!) I decided to add an extra element to the task.  I put a courgette, a cucumber, a large carrot and a single banana in my basket and then continued on.

The needles weren’t so much painful as uncomfortable unless I moved such a way that one of the points came out of my flesh and then pushed itself back in, I was getting quite horny though!

I went down the pharmacy isle and picked up a box of condoms and a bottle od Durex lube, cool mint flavour, and put them in the basket with the phallic shaped produce and then headed for the tills.

There were male and female cashiers available and I wasn’t sure which would work best but decided to go to the male one, he looked to be in his early twenties.  I took the items out of the basket and laid them on the conveyor one at a time so that they arrived to him in sequence, banana, carrot, courgette, cucumber, condoms, lube, then I stepped to the other side of the till and waited…and watched…and blushed.

He was totally professional.  I was hoping for a knowing smile or a raised eyebrow but he just packed the items into a bag for me and told me the price.  I was blushing anyway because I was thinking about what the items could mean and it was making me wet! Anyway, I paid and walked out of the shop.

The drive home was uneventful unless you count a lorry driver trying to crush me into a wall but I was very horny by the time I got home. The movement of pushing the peddles in the car had caused some serious discomfort between my legs and I was really ready to cum by the time I got back to my bedroom.

I quickly undressed and laid back down on my bed, spread my legs again and began to pull the needles out one by one.  It feels good when they come out, sort of like a wave of relief and I enjoyed doing it and watching the droplets of blood run from the tiny holes.

Once all the needles were out I used the carrot to fuck myself, I didn’t need the condoms or the lube, I was wet enough already and came quite quickly making a mess on my bed.

A bit about me

Seems a good place to start a new blog!  Well, I say new, its been here a while just patiently waiting for me to actually write something but I suppose as this is going to be the first real post it is still new!

So, to start I think I’ll list a few words to describe myself; submissive, masochistic, extreme, perverted, professional, responsible, serious, playful.  The first four relate to the side of my life that I will be writing about in this blog, the sexually submissive pain loving side, the latter four relate to the other part of my life which is the part where I have a successful career as a solicitor, a mortgage and very vanilla friends and colleagues and an active social life.  I guess the last one could relate to both 😉

The next part is a bit of history on me…..I was a “normal” girl up until the age of 18 when, on a whim, I decided to get my nipples pierced.  It was one of those epiphany moments!  I realise that day that I enjoyed pain, I not only enjoyed it but got sexual pleasure from it, that moment is the reason I am the way I am today.

After that I had several frustrating years sometimes embracing my masochism but mostly fighting it and trying to be like all the other girls. having boyfriends etc etc

Eventually I found a boyfriend who was into light bondage and had some fun with him, then I had another boyfriend who was more dominant, a little rougher and he helped me discover my submissive side but it didn’t last too long because I moved onto a slightly older guy who was much more dominant and who became my Master for a time, although I was never collared, I was just his sub.

That relationship also ended and then I met a girl called Joanne, we hit it off immediately and after a while started a secret relationship (my frist with a woman) which eventually turned into a Dominant/submissive relationship when I was collared as her slave (with a contact and everything).

I used to have a blog on here at the address  I used it to chronicle my adventures with Joanne, I also used the blog to get people to send me tasks to perform either on my own or with Jo’s help and then would write about it on the blog.

During my time as Jo’s slave I fulfilled a lot of my fantasies and a lot of hers, I did some crazy things and enjoyed them all, in hindsight if not always at the time!  I had both my nipples pierced and three rings in each outer labia all done on Jo’s orders and she also had me undergo laser hair removal on my pubic region so I can no longer grow hair there.

I had a lot of fun back then but that all ended when Jo was offered an amazing job opportunity in Australia, it was too good to turn down and as my career was just getting off the ground I didn’t want to leave.  It was a devastating time for me, Jo was my friend, then girlfriend before she was my Mistress and not only that she was the one who helped me realise (admit) that I was more attracted to women than men in the first place. I didn’t handle it well (and nor did she in my opinion) and it didn’t end on particularly healthy terms (she had released me from the slave contract by this point).

It was only a few months after this, and while I was still very down, that I had drunken “relations” with a very close female (vanilla) (straight?!) friend of mine and through her discovery of my piercings she learned a few truths about me that my vanilla group of friends had never been privy to before.  That night I was truly happy for the first time in a long time, however….

When I woke up the next morning, very hung over, she was gone.  I tried calling her and couldn’t get hold of her and by the following day I was starting to worry, mainly that we/I had damaged my relationship with this close friend but then as I struggled to get hold of other friends I started to worry more.

Eventually it came out that the girl who I’d slept with had regretted it big time once she sobered up because she was “straight” and I was “sick” and I should “stay away from her”, but worst of all she had told all of our friends about me, about my piercings and my fetishes (of which she only knew a few thankfully) and from there my life in London (where I was living at the time) began to degrade very  quickly.  One of the friends worked at my firm and though he never said anything I lived in constant fear that my colleagues, or worse my bosses, would find out.

I was lonely and depressed and eventually I decided to do something drastic, I found a new job and I left London within a month and without telling anybody outside of my family to whom I spun a tale about an amazing job offer in Cambridge. As it turns out the job I found was an amazing opportunity and since moving here I have made new friends and been promoted and bought a house.

The only down side of this new life is that I havent actively participated in the real life BDSM scene for a long time, that was the sacrifice I made when I moved here, I decided to have a “normal” life.  I removed my piercings, I deleted my blog and my email account and I left it all behind.  However, I wasn’t able to leave it behind completely, I’d left certain accounts open, like my SlaveFarm one, and after nearly a year I started to look again, then I set up a new mail account for my Lois Tyler “persona” (Lois is my real name, Tyler isn’t!) and then every now and again, when the urges got too strong I started to talk to people from SF, ask them for tasks that would be safe enough that I wouldn’t get exposed and carry them out.

That is sort of where I am now, although I keep disappointing people by not replying for ages or giving them reports when I say I will.  This is mainly because I am extremely busy with work and don’t get a great deal of time to myself despite living alone, but I try my best to always get back to people eventually.

I decided to start up my blog again as a way of doing this without upsetting anyone, I thought maybe it can be like it was before.  And maybe it can, maybe it can’t, we will see but in the mean time I will just write down things that come to me and hopefully people will read it and enjoy it…..I feel like I’m rambling a bit now!

That’s it for “A brief history of Lois Tyler”!  I’m going to go and dry my face now as the story above always makes me cry, hopefully this will be the last time I have to tell it for a while!