To slave or not to slave

Thank you all for your responses, I really didn’t expect to get many comments on this one, or votes for that matter, thank you for caring 🙂

I think I could have predicted that no-one would say no but it’s interesting that about a third of you voted to set limits on it, that is kind of where I was leaning because I thought “what if she makes me do something that affects my work or something”, I would then be in a very difficult position of not obeying or risking something going wrong in the vanilla part of my life, I wouldn’t want to do either!

The most compelling argument that I read though came from Manc who said “It’s not TPE if you have restrictions” and he is exactly right! The whole point of it, from my point of view at least, is that I have no control over what happens, I am giving up that control and giving it to Kayleigh.

That sort of got me thinking about what the point of it is to her, she wants to control me in every way and if I was to set restrictions or limits then am I really giving her what she wants, and if I’m not then what is the point? It was her idea/request in the first place!

So, I have just text Kayleigh:
Hey sexy, I’ve had a little think and have come to the conclusion that I would really love to give you total control for a week, in fact I can’t wait, when do you want it to start Miss?!

Basically she knows me well, she knows what is important to me and she knows where to draw a line. I trust her, if I didn’t I wouldn’t even consider doing this in the first place! I am very excited about it now although I know it won’t all be pleasant, she can be a complete bitch sometimes!

I just got a text back from her:
I knew you would say yes you little slut! You’ll be sorry soon enough though (devil smiley) We’ll talk about it later, I’m coming round after work, now leave me alone bitch, I’m working.

So that’s that organised I guess! Nice of her to let me know she is coming round tonight as well, I didn’t know about that until now, good job I didn’t have plans!  I can’t text her again now, she loves telling me to shut up and it absolutely drives me crazy! I get punished if I then send her another text or talk or anything after that.

One time I text her after she told me not to text her again when she was at work, she came round after work stuck a piece of duct tape over my mouth, drew over the edges of it with lipstick and then told me not to take it off until she said I could. The lipstick was so she could see if it had been removed and put back on, very clever my Domme! She only took it off after work the next day! It was very irritating and I couldn’t eat, she did let me put a small hole in it big enough to fit the tiny straw from a drinks carton through but that was it. Anyway it taught me a lesson, although I still do it, I can’t help myself sometimes!

maybe I should write more about her punishments, I don’t think I really write about them very much because they aren’t generally part of play sessions or anything, she just sometimes feels the need to punish me so she does! They aren’t always that exciting though, one time she forbid me from drinking anything except tap water for a week because I put sugar in her tea! An overreaction I thought! I was particularly grumpy after a week without coffee or coke!

In other news I found another archive blog entry, this one is from a long time ago (in a galaxy far away) when I started my very first blog! I got my friend to post it on BDSM Library for me to get some readers basically so I found it on there.  You can read it here if you are interested.

OK, that’s all for now, I’ll let you know what she has to say for herself tomorrow! This might raise the whole telling her about the blog issue again actually! hmmmm……

9 thoughts on “To slave or not to slave

  1. Alex

    Congratulations my dear pain slut Lois …. You are a brave slave to give her TPE for a whole week !!
    I hope though, that posting daily updates throughout the week would not be a problem! Let’s see!

  2. Onohara

    Congratulations! You’re the best judge of this – if you trust that she won’t interfere with your work or other outside things you need to maintain, you’re fine.

    The thing that I flagged in your previous post is your comment that “play time [would be] all the time.” This isn’t how I thought about my long-term M/S experience (which was very, very good – 20 years later she and I are still close friends) at all, and I was concerned you might not fully appreciate how within a few days at most it will rearrange completely how you experience your life. But I forgot that you’ve done this before, with Joanne. I apologize for that. You know what you’re doing.

    From a very outside perspective Kayleigh has been pointing toward this almost since the beginning and has managed it very, very well, astonishingly so given her age. And she’s clearly very attuned to you, and you to her. It’ll be great! Difficult at times for you 🙂 but great.

    It’s been a privilege, and great fun, to follow through this blog your narration of how the relationship has developed. Thank you for that gift, and I’m sure other readers agree. But I’d rather miss out on the rest of the story because you have to abandon or take down the blog than have you risk what could be a very special relationship. You have got to tell her about this, hun. xo

  3. Dante

    There’s two sides to every situation. On the one hand I, like everyone here, hope/wish/state that the experiment will go well and on the other hand I MUST play the role of Devil’s Advocate (especially now that that piece of dog shit you so worried about your face being push into in a previous post from your old blog… has now been stepped in by you, Lois).

    Yes it is an experiment on Kayleigh’s part but the real question is WHY the experiment, WHY now at such an early stage in this relationship …I mean if the both of you are really READY for a TPE lifestyle – why this 7 day experiment? This is nothing more than role playing TPE for 7 days. And as such, as far as having to let Kayleigh know of this blog is premature as this is only a 7 day experiment which can certainly survive not hearing from you during that time (after all you went about a month or longer without any post here earlier if you all can remember)

    As I said to you the other night when we were chatting, Kayleigh is still quite young and trying to find her “niche” as a Domme.

    There is another thing which has just joggled my memory regarding my initial thoughts of Kayleigh with this new post above. I can remember thinking when you first introduced us to her (although I can not honestly recall what it exactly was but I do remember thinking this)…that there was/is something lurking in the darkest hallows of her and it was very easy to see it because the very same thing resides in me and that is called revenge which does not necessarily need to be directed at the responsible party, but towards any one, towards any group, towards any class of individual(s). (However in defense of sadist, revenge does provide motivation to being sadistic; the difference is whether it controls you or you control it!)

    In your post above you have shed some important light as to what I am speaking of in divulging some of the punishment you have received from her like no coffee or coke for a week for putting sugar in her tea – “an overreaction” you said, which obviously you thought about it… but then pushed it aside in a manner like the valley girls saying “whateverrrrrr” to something they don’t want to take the time to think about further. Remember that you are dealing with a very young Domme finding her “niche”… so yes it was overreactive domonstrating her maturity level AND it was excessive considering the “crime” (that’s the revenge part).

    Taping your mouth was misdirected as your fingers did the texting, had you phoned her, it still would have been your fingers doing the dialing before you opened your mouth and inserted your foot…hence misdirected (and yes we could talk about the parallel symbolism taping your mouth was however breaking your fingers would have been more in line with the guilty part of your body for the “crime”….oh…that would be excessive and vengeful but taking the phone away would not have been and also properly directed….God forbid your generation having to use a land line to communicate!)

    Well my dear Lois you have certainly stepped in it now…we can only hope you didn’t get any on you! This relationship is less than 6 months old between two individuals who were perfect strangers before that – hell the infatuation has yet to experience any wearing …

    Oh…and by the by…(yes I meant to say by the by) if my comments are playing on your mind, then I have achieved my purpose AND if your TPE role playing experiment comes off without a hitch, I will have still achieved my purpose (because you will be thinking the entire time about this and when the shoe will drop)

    Enjoy! muahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

    • Lois

      Good morning Dante, thank you for your rather long and thought provoking comment, I have read it a few times during my hours of boredom last night!

      As I have mentioned in my recent post, I believe Kayleigh wants to do the TPE week to see what it would be like if we ever decided to go down that route and to be honest, so do I. We are both very aware that our relationship is still in it’s infancy and I have no wish to rush into something that could see me hurt in the future, I have already played that game once before if you recall. Yes Kayleigh is young but she is a very mature young lady, more mature than me in some ways, and I believe she knows what she wants long term and that this request is her testing the waters to ensure she is not wasting her time and mine with something that may not go where she wants to go.

      I’m an intelligent person, I don’t just go along with things without putting a lot of thought into it myself and when I thought about this TPE thing I decided that it is something I would like to try. I have tried a lot of different things in BDS< but this isn't one of them and I am curious to see what it would be like to give that level of control over to another person, I might hate it but at least then I will know and Kayleigh will know and we can move forward with that additional knowledge about each other.

      As for the punishments, yes I thought making me drink water for putting sugar in her tea was an overreaction, but to be fair it wasn't the first time I had done it (who doesn't have sugar in tea?!) and I had been warned to be more conscientious when doing things for her. Perhaps I should put more background into my writing before making flippant comments about things somewhat out of context. Oh, and I completely disagree about the other punishment, taping my mouth was the perfect punishment because it wasn't just about that one text, she likes to tell me to be quiet when she knows I want to say something else because she says I always have to have the last word, sometimes I just can't help myself though. After the tape punishment I was much better….for a while. I also don't believe that the punishment always needs to fit the crime, sometimes she just wants to be mean and that is her prerogative!

  4. leo

    yes to slave; it is your dream. yes to kaleigh as she seems to care for you as well, and is a natural skilled and matured person. yes it is for one week only, and how much you wish to enter it as well as kaleigh does, you need to care for the period afterwards (damage control) so make sure that she cares for you in the sense that your work and career is cared for. she will understand, but is well to mention it. she might/will punish you on the argument that you should have trusted her, yet you have to be ensured on it/ kaleigh works and acts quick. i wish you a fabolous week and a long happy to come.
    no it is too premature to tell about the blog.
    let us see how the week will go for you.

    • Lois

      I trust Kayleigh not to be reckless with the control that I am giving her and in all honesty I would break the agreement if she put me in a position where I felt I had to do that. If that happened though I think we would have learnt all we need to about TPE in our relationship.

      I am confident that would not happen though, otherwise I wouldn’t entertain the idea of doing it.

  5. Simon

    I have found the comments on here as interesting as the posts. They just go to show what a wide variation there is on D/s, M/s relationships. The common theme is that we all care and have concern for you, strangers basically, nevertheless we do care. The fact you considered the TPE request suggests at least part of you wants this, wants to explore and wants to please Kayleigh – all good reasons to go forward. I thought about the TPE when you first posted it, Keyleigh’s age, the short time you have known her but balanced this on what you have written about her, her punishments, her time with you. The spider play suggested to me she has a wicked streak but its controlled, both attributes of a good Domme. Punishments -drinking only water for a week, perhaps a stern punishment but certainly no harm , quite the opposite – giving your system a good cleansing and perhaps a tingle of submission everytime you went/wanted a drink and got water instead of your desired coffee or coke. No speaking, again I thought was a good one because she could enjoy your punishment. Taking away your phone would restrict her communication with you (we all love the sending and receiving sexy text), breaking your fingers!!! I hope that just an example to show relationship to the crime and not an actual suggestion.
    Bottom line, IF Keyleigh were to ask you to do something that would damage your health, public life or career I have confidence in you, your common sense and maturity, to say something. I am sure Keyleigh will listen, if not, she is not the right Domme. Simples. 🙂

    • Lois

      Thank you for your words, it always makes me happy to read comments on my posts but this post in particular seems to have hit a nerve with my readers and they/you have felt the need to write some very insightful messages, I am very grateful for that, it is one of the main reasons I wanted to keep the blog so badly.

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